Sayang

I could’ve been graduating with honors. If not for that solitary 2.75 grade I received, I could’ve been marching down with a medal wrapped around my neck.

I was first year then. And a lost soul was I. I was still on that phase where having a firm conviction about one’s self if a rarity, where conforming begets acceptance, where being radical is kewl, where not being good is better.

I didn’t want to take school that seriously. For me, being GC (grade conscious) sounds cheesy. Having my high school motto, “Grades do not measure intelligence” encrusted upon my chest, I decided to live my college life in the most carefree manner as possible.

When Demand Exceeds Supply

I hated my Economics in college. It’s not the subject per se; the abhorrence emanates more from the professor than any other. She was old, batty, balding, and inconsiderate and a worshipper of the numbers 3 and 5. She will trample you with tons of requirements yet you barely understand what she teaches (if she does). She was so full of demands that my supply of patience went zero.

I put up a silent rebellion against her. I never recited. I slept in her class. I passed hastily done assignments. I cursed her every time her shadow crosses our room. I hated her. Then she gave me a 2. 75. I cursed her once more.

It took time before I realized what that grade means – adios Mr. cum laude. I know I could’ve done better than to rant about her. But I didn’t do it. Had I not blew my cool I wouldn’t be feeling sorry for myself. But heck, it’s time to move on now. I really wanted to say more about this but I guess I’ll just let it be this way.

Indeed, grades don’t always measure intelligence but they reflect one’s discipline.

[Mega thanks to Aneng for the inspiration for this post.]

Offline

Now that I’m counting only a couple of months till graduation, it’s not unusual for me to be exposed to a lot of tasks and responsibilities necessary for me to get that friggin’ piece of parchment called ‘diploma’. Stuff like studying for our exams, creating a unique, innovative, marketable product for Consumer Behavior, making a novel-based comic book for that effin’ World Literature, catching cockroaches, mosquitoes and all them disease-causing minute creatures for Microbiology and Parasitology, finding a reputable company where I can have my OJT, and most importantly, accomplishing our thesis which, until now, is only half-way done, and so forth (mind you, my major’s Psychology, though the subjects don’t reflect).

So yes, I’m exposed to a whole lot of stressors. But that was it. I’m only exposed, not really stressed. For I’m not doing everything I have to do to ‘feel the stress’. Some people blame it on my slothful tendencies. But me? I blame it on the Internet.

I know it’s not right, but I’m starting to notice that my whole life’s slowly being taken over by technology, especially the WWW. I feel edgy whenever I fail to go online to blog-hop, or check my Facebook and email accounts, or even get trivial updates on Yahoo! I go online more often than I should perform more essential duties. Internet addiction? Well, I hope I’m not there yet.

So, trying to break the habit, I had a self-imposed Internet-free day. That is one whole day of not clicking Google Chrome on my desktop and doing those things that I’m trying to, wanting to, and should do. And the outcomes were quite satisfying (Note that I got home yesterday at around 6:30 PM):

1. I was able to re-read and re-edit our thesis;

2. I was able to clear out the junkyard that is my room;

3. I was able to read several chapters of the book I’m trying to finish;

4. I was able to edit the uber TH (trying hard) music video I made; and

5. Again, I was able to make a blog entry!

So the attempt was an epic success. I felt thrilled by the thought that I could last a day without the Internet. And by 12:01 AM, I’m back to the online world again.

An Open Letter to the Devil's Advocate

So it's Goodbye now for us. Finally.

I cannot say that time flies fast 'coz each class we have with you was dragging, every bit of second spent (wasted?) was sacrifice. Every time you enter the room you out us all in a defensive mode, anticipating the shrapnel-like tirades about our awful 'mistakes'. Mistakes that you just made all up. And if we ever have one, it's the only thing that you'd see.

Instead of providing us the essentials, you shower us your 'destructive criticisms', which will all boil down to one thing -- WE LEARN NOTHING. Heck, as if you teach us something.

You are the mother of ironies. You regard yourself as a mentor yet you don't understand how we, students feel. You talk about Psychology yet you act as if you haven't got a speck of idea of how our minds work. So didn't learn anything now?

It's sad. 'Coz I give teachers (though you seriously don't deserve to be called such) my deepest admiration but knowing someone like you? I think i'll have a second thought in generalizing.

You are nothing. You impulsive, self-indulgent hag.

Stressed Out

Ah, the hell weeks are back again. It's just a week to go before the end of the term but here we are still cramming and trying to accomplish a mountain pile of requirements.

For this week we've got a pre-final examination covering ALL of the topics that we've (or should have) learned, a research paper and a written report to submit. And adding to my burden are my *oh I don't wanna curse* group mates who are so cooperative that they could've just given me all the workload. And oh, I almost forgot, I still have to finish my Humanities notebook 'coz that's a big part of my final grade. Gosh, does our professor think he teaches high school students?

And of course, next week will be the time that I dread most. It's actually the most ironic week of all. At first, a feeling of excitement and relief will burgeon you 'coz obviously, it's the remaining days of the whole semester. But heck, imagine your last week jam-packed with 4 major examinations, 2 additional reports and another written report. How I envy the worms. I could've just died.

I've always believed that I have mastered the art of cramming back in high school (our batch had the reputation of cramming over almost everything). But I seriously got myself wron. College is a lot more seriuos business.

I badly need inspiration right now. Seriously.

Challenge ( The-Article-With-No-Title 2)

The Noli de Castro Academic Excellence and Exemplary Leadership Awards did not last without a surprise. I was gradually getting uninterested with the show until Sheryl Cosim, the event’s emcee, introduced this particular awardee. “ Karen Leslie Dematera…”—hmm...what a familiar name, something I’ve heard before but I'm not sure.Then these words struck me, “…From the Marikina Science High School.” – now that’s familiar.

At that point I finally realized that the name I just heard belonged to the current valedictorian of the school mentioned, the school where I came from.

Astig!

Speaking inside the Palace in front of the Vice President and other esteemed individuals? That ought to count for something.

Still, I am not totally impressed. For the achievements of one do not reflect the capabilities of all.

I have firmly believed that, not that I’m bragging about it (konti lang), my batch (batch ’06, by the way), so far is the best batch that the school has ever had all throughout its existence. Bagging numerous awards and recognitions inside and even outside the country, breaking records in terms of the number of students who qualified for the country’s top universities, in short producing the most talented and the most competent students to beat.

I’m not totally taking it away from our descendants, though. Success and achievements still continue to pour, but not as “glorious” as the ones we’ve had under our belt. You guys have a lot of catching up to do.

So to our successors, it is now your duty to prove that I am wrong. Prove it.

The-Article-With-No-Title

Last Friday, after I arrived from work, I immediately retreated to my hell-ventilated room to have some good siesta. I turned on my TV and switched the channel to NBN 4. I was expecting to see another taped match of the Shakey’s V-League but apparently that was not the case. Instead, what took its place for the moment was an awarding ceremony in Malacañang with the title, Noli de Castro Academic Excellence and Exemplary Leadership Awards. Intrigued, I decided to stick to the show.

Apparently, the ceremony was, as the name suggests, intended to recognize the twelve most outstanding public high school graduates who outstandingly exemplified the core principles of academic excellence and leadership (Actually, I’ve always been imagining myself to be in a position similar to them and I’m proud to say that this dream has been fulfilled…in my imagination again *sigh*).

As I listen to the student awardees deliver their speeches, I can’t help but…laugh. Bombarding each sentences with highfalutin words, putting into use every idiomatic expression and figure of speech possible -- a typical high school literary work, that’s what I got from those smart and talented kids (Hey, I’m just months older than the legal age, OK?). High school na high school ang dating. Just makes me burst with laughter. Just makes me remember myself.

Guilty? Haha.